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"I hated this movie. Hated, hated, hated, hated, hated this movie. Hated it. Hated every simpering stupid vacant audience-insulting moment of it."

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"You're too fucking nice!"
The Nostalgia Critic on Ebert's quote (after reviewing said movie)
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"A 'critic' is a man who creates nothing and thereby feels qualified to judge the work of creative men. There is logic in this; he is unbiased — he hates all creative people equally."
Lazarus Long, Time Enough for Love
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Simon: (Reading correspondence on Transformers: Dark of the Moon) "...big alien machines, big explosions, big army stuff, fast cars, and battles and thats-gonna-hurt scenes. Very very entertaining, better than the last effort by miles. And with that spirit of optimism, let's find out what Mark thinks."

Mark: Well it's horrible, vile, vulgar and hideous, but it's important to understand why.
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