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Funny moments from DBZ Abridged. WARNING: You might be here a while.
DBZ Abridged - Episodes 1-10[]
Episode 1[]
- All of the farmer's lines, despite the fact that he only has about 4 of them in the entire series.
Farmer: (notices spaceship crash on his farm in the distance) OH GOD NO, MY MARIJUANA PATCH! I mean uhhh, my carrot patch. Uh... YEAH.(approaches crashed spaceship) Guess I'll do what any sensible Middle American would do in this situation (pulls out rifle): GIT MAH GUN! (Notices Raditz getting out of his ship) HOLY CRAP, IT'S SONIC THE HEDGEHOG! Oh wait, no... Its an alien! HOLY S***, IT'S AN ALIEN! |
- For added hilarity, this troper always thought he said "a pool." Because it seemed like something Raditz would have said, with Bardock looking frustrated and annoyed at him.
- Goku meeting Raditz.
Goku: So what are you here for? The Dragon Balls? |
Bulma: Hey I'm here. |
- Piccolo and Tom. That is all.
Piccolo: Why should I help you? |
Episode 2[]
Raditz, Goku, and Piccolo in Episode 2:
Raditz: Aha! Attacking an opponent up to four times your strength in a one-on-one battle. A cunning strategy... no, no, not cunning. What's the opposite of that? |
- "DAMN YOU, HINDSIIIIIIIIIIIIGHT!!!!"
- Bleh.
- Right after Goku dies:
- "DAMN YOU, HINDSIIIIIIIIIIIIGHT!!!!"
Krillin: Holy crap. (cheerfully): I'm not the first person to die in this series! |
- Piccolo mentally singing Mahna Mahna while Goku "distracts" Raditz.
Episode 3[]
- King Yemma's rant about his (Mahogany!) desk.
King Yemma: And not just any mahogany! But mahogany from the planet of Malchior 7! Where the trees are 300 feet tall and breathe fire! From these trees this desk was forged 2,000 years ago, using ancient blood rituals of the ancient Malchior people! Not only does this make my desk nigh indestructable, but it can bend the fabric of the universe itself! Also, it's a very fine material. Very expensive. |
Episode 4[]
- Goku's defeat of Princess Snake.
- As well as her earlier spying on a naked Goku...while hiding in a cardboard box.
- The backstory behind the blood fountain in hell.
Goku: Have you guys seen my brother Raditz around here? Spiky hair...tail? |
Episode 5[]
- Meanwhile, Back in episode 5,
Guru: Nail... Nail! |
- And later,
Guru: NAAAIL! |
- Vegeta rocks the Arlian king... like a hurricane.
- The reward of the Arlians freed by Nappa and Vegeta.
Arlian: You have freed our race! We shall erect statues of you... |
- Absolutely anything Mr. Popo says.
Kami: Mr. Popo, where did you send them? |
- Hell, the first time he speaks:
Popo: Alright maggots, listen up. Popo's 'bout to teach you the pecking order: it goes you, the dirt, the worms inside the dirt, Popo's stool, Kami; and Popo. Any questions? |
- Everything he says in episode 11.
- Or episode 24.
Kami: Mr.Popo, what are you watering? |
Episode 6[]
- Freeza the Wiki vandal:
Stupid monkeys hit by falling rocks (not deathball thrown by Freeza). Ahahahahahahaha! P.S.: Freeza rules you! |
- Popo's last comments for the Z fighters after they've completed their training are hilariously blunt.
Episode 7[]
- Here's a little fact from Namek: Namekains may be powerful fighters, but they have one weakness: they don't have penises!
Nappa: Look, Vegeta! A Namekian! |
- And from the Fake Namek episode:
Krillin: Wait a second! Namekians don't HAVE penises! |
- And from Episode 22:
Nail: Well Sir, if you're having a problem with our Customer Support you can call 1-800-eat-a-d*ck! |
- When Nail instructs Piccolo on fusing, he tells the latter to put his on his chest...lower...lower...lower...little lower...
Nail: Ahh, if we had junk you'd be gay right now! |
Episode 8[]
- When Nappa stops in mid air.
Nappa: Vegeta! |
Episode 9[]
- Nappa and Vegeta's discussion at the start of the episode:
Krillin: (With Nappa charging towards him) Wait, myturnmyturnMYTURN! |
- Krillin shows off his new technique:
Krillin: HEY! Stop treating me like a joke dammit! I've got a new technique-- which I probably could've used earlier and maybe saved all of our friends' lives-- but that's beside the point! (charging a disc of energy in his hand) Get ready for my destructo disc! |
- Gohan loses his temper:
Gohan: I'm gonna eviscerate you and use your gastrointestinal tract as a condom while I fornicate with your skull! |
- Then, much later:
Krillin: Breath, Gohan! You're a leaf. A leaf in a calm stream! |
- Krillin tells Goku about the fate of his friends:
- Team Four Star presents their version of one of the most famous Memetic Mutations in anime history:
Nappa: Vegeta! What does the scouter say about his power level?! |
- And on the subject of Memetic Mutations:
Nappa: Hey Vegeta, I'm a-firin' my BLLLLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRGGGGHHHH! |
- This episode ends with a surprisingly understated (yet hysterical) moment where Vegeta finally kills Nappa for his unrelenting stupidity at exactly nine minutes and eighteen seconds. His reaction is a simple smile.
Episode 10[]
Goku: Are you okay in there? |
Goku: What's going on, guys? We won, right? |
- When Goku and Vegeta are about to fight:
Vegeta: It's like you're beef jerky and I'm Filet Mignon. |
- And later, Son Goku: squeaky toy.
(Oozaru!Vegeta has Goku in his grasp) |
Goku: Gohan, this is daddy. I know you angry right now but you have to focus your anger. R-remember Icarus? (shows Icarus and explosion) He did it. |
- But the crowning moment of them all came at the very end of the first season as a throwaway gag. "GHOST NAPPA!" [1]
- Vegeta, at the end of episode 10, comes across an old friend, much to his horror
Vegeta: "They've broken my body... I've failed in my mission to find the Dragon Balls... I even lost my tail... but, at least... it can't get any worse... from here..." |
- Goku hits his head harder than he thought and believed he was in the Dragon Ball Evolution continuity.
Goku: Man, this is worse than that time I was in high school, and all the guys called me "Geeko", and I was Piccolo's slave, I couldn't get Chi-Chi to like me, and... Oh wow, I hit that rock harder than I thought. |
- Vegeta when he loses his temper is always hilarious.
Vegeta: SAY GOODBYE TO YOUR PLANET KAKAROT!! |
- More Card Carrying Villainy from Vegeta:
Vegeta: Hey Kakarot, what's the opposite of Christopher Walken? (Crushes Goku's legs) CHRISTOPHER REEVE! |
- The entire Kaio-ken running gag.
Vegeta: I'm going to obliterate you, and the rest of this planet myself with my own two- |
- And again.
Vegeta: I told you Kakarot! There's no way you can measure up to an elite like me! You're fighting a losing battle here. You might as well just surrender this pathetic planet now and- |
- Once more, during the Galick Gun/Kamehameha struggle:
Vegeta: This is the end Kakarot! You don't stand a chance! I put all my power into this attack! Now perish... WITH THE REST OF YOUR PATHETIC WORLD! |
- Meanwhile, Back at the Plot:
Vegeta: -UUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK. |
- Brought back again in Bardock: Father of Goku during a flash-forward.
Goku: Kaio Ken! |
Ginyu (in Goku's body): This is absurd! His power level was a league above my own when we fought! What the blazes is going on?! |
- Vegeta getting hit in the face with a Solar Flare.
"AAAAH. My eyes! Oh God, it's like walking in on Freeza in the shower. Wait a minute, Freeza's always naked - AAAAAAGGGGHHH! |
- This becomes even funnier in episode 15, when Dodoria is hit by a Solar Flare....And you can see a split second shot of Freeza's face PhotoShopped on a picture of a muscular man in the shower.
- Also in general Vegeta getting hit in the eye.
- This becomes even funnier in episode 15, when Dodoria is hit by a Solar Flare....And you can see a split second shot of Freeza's face PhotoShopped on a picture of a muscular man in the shower.
Vegeta:" Again with the f***ing eye!!" |
- This Bit Before Vegeta's Transformation:
DBZ Abridged - Episodes 11-20[]
Episode 11[]
- Gohan's extreme calling out to his mother, Chi Chi in episode 11:
Chi Chi: Well, all I know is that my little boy isn't going anywhere. |
- Goku's failed attempt at borrowing Popo's magic flying carpet.
Mr. Popo: "MAKIN' TOAST! [...] BUTTERIN' TOAST!" |
- Season 2 gives us Goku's reaction to Popo.
Episode 12[]
- Krillin's inner monologue at the start of the episode:
Krillin: Krillin's Log, stardate...uh...November 28th. We've been flying for two weeks now, and I'm starting to feel very tensed up. Not just for being trapped on the ship of course, but from Bulma walking around in nothing but her underwear! I would relieve this tension, but I've had no alone time SINCE THE TOLIET KEEPS SCREAMING AT ME!! I'm not sure how much longer I can last... |
- Vegeta realizing how anyone might have found out about the dragon balls.
That's impossible, my transmitter was off the entire time! Whose scouter was... (eyes focus, cuts away to him riding a space pod screaming:) GODDAMMIT NAPPAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! |
Episode 13[]
- Roshi: (On the telephone) "Could you speak up? I'm not wearing any pants."
- Every line uttered by Krillin in this episode.
(After successfully hiding from the onslaught of Freeza's forces.) |
- After dealing with Bulma being a total cocktease on the ship, Krillin... 'releases some tension and takes ten whole minutes for it. When Bulma goes into the cave to set up camp...
Bulma: "Oh God, it's everywhere!!" |
- The final moments of the episode, narrated by Little Kuriboh:
Narrator: A new evil has revealed its face. Who are these mysterious enemies, and do Gohan and Krillen stand a chance? The answers to these questions will be revealed... right now. Zarbon, Dadoria, Freeza, and Oh My, No. |
Episode 14[]
- In Episode 14...
Krillin: QUACK!! |
- Oh, the joke goes much farther than that. Originally, in order to avoid being caught by Dodoria, Krillin pretends to be a space duck by yelling "Quack!" over and over. After being caught, he yells a parting quack as he and Gohan take Dende away. Much later on, Goku arrives on Namek. As he goes on about the planet's beauty and splendor, he hears Krillin's anguished cries of pain... and thinks it's a space duck. He only catches on to the plight when Krillin gives out a pathetic "Quack".
- When Freeza appears after Porunga is summoned, Krillin tries to fool him into beleiving he is a Space Duck... While he's standing directly in front of Freeza.
- Oh, the joke goes much farther than that. Originally, in order to avoid being caught by Dodoria, Krillin pretends to be a space duck by yelling "Quack!" over and over. After being caught, he yells a parting quack as he and Gohan take Dende away. Much later on, Goku arrives on Namek. As he goes on about the planet's beauty and splendor, he hears Krillin's anguished cries of pain... and thinks it's a space duck. He only catches on to the plight when Krillin gives out a pathetic "Quack".
Freeza: Well Vegeta, you've finally pulled it off. You've managed to dash my hopes entirely... With some help, I see... |
- Every response from Freeza and co. when the Namekian villagers did something to anger them.
Namekian Elder: "Why are you here? Why are you killing our people?" |
- Freeza making a mental list of every heroic speech he hears.
Namekian: We're going... to... f*** your face! |
Episode 15[]
- Vegeta's reaction to Dodoria's true gender:
- What compounds the hilarity is that the second "What" sounds like (and probably is) Lanipator's real voice.
- And this:
- What compounds the hilarity is that the second "What" sounds like (and probably is) Lanipator's real voice.
Dodoria: And that's why I was considered the most beautiful, and fertile, woman on my home planet. Before Freeza blew it up. |
Episode 16[]
- The beginning of episode 16. The audience knows what's about to happen, and the happy music and cheerful outlook of the Namekians make the coming slaughter of them by Vegeta all the more hilarious.
- Anything Guru said in the episode 16...
Guru: "Nail, I have a bitch of an itch on my left ass cheek." |
- This exchange:
Krillin: Aw, you made a friend, Little Green? Oh, I know, I'm gonna call you "Big Green"! |
Episode 17[]
- From episode 17:
Vegeta: I've got a lovely bunch of dragon balls, dodododoodo, here they are all sitting in a bunch, do doo do. One Star, Two Star, all as big as my head! Give em a toss, a planet across, that's how Vegeta wins BU-BYE! |
- And after that, him hiding in the water, complete with submarine noises:
Vegeta: Later, bitches. *awoooga! awoooga!* |
- The glorious return of Ghost Nappa:
'Ghost Nappa: (whistles) Is this thing on? Is it on? (tuning noises) OK, there we go! A-HA-HEM!! You are now thinking about what Zarbon did to you while you were unconscious. Have fun with that. |
- Freeza and Zarbon's Innocent Innuendo.
Freeza: Ginyu, quick; double time! Zarbon really screwed the pooch on this one! |
- Krillin (and later Gohan): "I got a Dragon Ball!"
- Bulma being distracted by Zarbon.
Bulma: Oh my God he's so hot! I just want to grab him and -- |
- Then Bulma's reaction to transformed Zarbon: KILL IT WITH FIRE!!!
- Goku: "I'm gonna beat someone up!" and "I'm gonna beat him up!" and "EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!"
- Zarbon is straight and acts really surprised if someone calls him gay. And even so, Zarbon still acts like he's gay.
Freeza: Oh... and all this time I could've sworn you were- ...never mind. |
- Vegeta's final words to Zarbon as he prepares to shoot a hole through his stomach. Doubly funny due to Zarbon's confused expression:
Vegeta: Let me put this in a way you'll understand; I'm about to blow my load all over your insides. |
- And then what he says after he dies:
Vegeta: Freaky Alien Genotype. |
- This scene, especially the expressions Zarbon and Freeza have at the end of it.
Freeza: APPULE?! You left Appule here?! |
- King Kai's telepathic "call" to Goku.
King Kai: Hello Goku? Do you hear me? I swear to God, if this is George Takei again, I'm gonna shove a brick up the Verizon guy's ass! |
- King Kai then proceeds to order Goku to stay away from Freeza, warning him about his incredible power. Goku gets more and more excited about the prospect of fighting him until King Kai makes Goku promise not to do so.
Goku: Oh all right. I absolutely promise not to...click beeeeeeeeeeeeeee... |
- The exchange between Zarbon and Appule:
Zarbon: Why isn't he naked? |
- Guru telling Dende how old he is in the stinger:
Dende: Guru sir, I have a question. |
Episode 18[]
- In episode 18: Vegeta discovers the Dragonball he hid away is missing. This irritates him.
- On that same note, the fact that his scream can be heard by Goku in space, King Yemma in the afterlife (who mistakes it for his ex-wife) and TRUNKS TWENTY YEARS IN THE FUTURE ON ANOTHER PLANET IN AN ALTERNATE TIMELINE.
Trunks: Daddy? |
- Then there's his Inner Monologue before The Scream.
Vegeta: God, I love it when a plan comes together! Took some time, effort, and lots of bodies, but now it's mine. Immortality is my bitch! Now, it should be right here...riiiight here... Where the hell is it? It couldn't have gone anywhere... All right, I'm going to close my eyes, and when I open them up it's going to be right here- it's not here. Why isn't it here!? I don't get it! Who could've-?! The kid! But, how could he have found it, it was- Wait. That watch...that watch wasn't a watch at all! It was some kind of Dragon Ball locator! Which means...which means...! |
- The whole "I need an adult" running gag
Gohan: So, uh, can I help you? |
- Later...
Krillin: Gohan, I'll be getting you to Guru's now. |
- Later still...
Guru: Now, relax as I reach deep inside you and grab hold of your essence. |
- While it doesn't feature the "I need an adult" phrase, the joke leading up to it is pretty hilarious too.
- This exchange between Nail and Vegeta:
Nail: Hello? Can I ... help you with something? |
- Krillin's Reason You Suck Speech to Bulma in Episode 18.
Krillin: (In response to why he didn't stop Vegeta from taking a Dragon Ball) I don't know! Maybe you could've bitched at him! How 'bout that? That's all you appear to be good for these days! Huh? Used your bitch fu on him? Bulma, the mistress of bitching, that's what they should call you! |
- After the Vegeta and Gohan scene:
Krillin: Seriously! Five ancient sages of bitchdom all gathered one day on the peaks of Mount Bitch to proclaim your birth! And a hundred years later, when all the bitch stars have aligned, you were born and made everybody's life around you a living hell, because YOU! ARE SUCH! A BITCH! |
- The long-awaited arrival of the Ginyu Force:
Vegeta: Besides Freeza, I'm the most powerful being on this planet! Bar none. |
- Vegeta after he finally catches up with Krillin. He can't speak coherently, his eyes are bloodshot, and he's yelling at Ghost Nappa.
Vegeta: I-am-here-for-it. |
- Perhaps more funny is the constant "drug withdrawal" Does This Remind You of Anything? during the above.
- When Vegeta regains his wits, Krillin blabs about Guru's ability to release untapped potential.
Vegeta: I'm going to pay him a... uh... what do you call it? |
- The entire end of Episode 18, with Goku trying to think of what to drink.
Beer: No, it's too early to get crunk. |
- Every time Guru shouts at Nail, especially when Nail is preparing to pulverize Vegeta.
Guru: Naaaaaail!!! Stop making out with your boyfriend! I can hear it from here! It sounds like (gagging and slurping noises) |
- When Gohan arrives with Vegeta's Dragonball in episode 18:
Gohan: You guys, I think we should move to a new location. |
Bulma hating the fact that she's always getting abandoned on Namek.
Bulma: Oh no, no no no! I am not letting yo abandon me here again! Those bitches on Lifetime might put up with it, but not me! |
Episode 19[]
- The Wheel of Death routine from episode 19. Even funnier because this is exactly what the Ginyu Force would do with enough time and preparation. Then there's Vegeta's reaction.
Vegeta: When did you have time to set this up?! Is- is that a camera? What kind of sadistic retard watches this crap?! |
- Vegeta sounding like The Man Your Man Could Smell Like.
Vegeta Look at your men, now back to me, now look back at your men, now back to me. I am not your men! I'm flipping you off! Look at the ground, back to me. Where is the Dragonball? It's gone! I threw it! And there's not a damn thing you can- |
- While Vegeta's spouting off various ways of saying they're going to die:
Super Kami Guru: Naaaaaaaiiillll! Slap him. |
- Even more hilarious from behind the scenes since both Krillin and Vegeta are voiced by the same guy.
- Vegeta's reaction to Krillin deciding to call them "Team Three Star."
Vegeta: What. |
- Later in the same episode, after Krillin has messed up again.
Ginyu: Supposedly there are seven (Dragon Balls) in total, if my report is correct. And the other five are-? |
- Bulma's attempted rape fantasy with Vegeta should also count. It's Crosses the Line Twice at best.
Vegeta (with a menacing tone): Hello, Earth woman. |
- Or when Vegeta tells Krillin to destroy the Dragon ball in the same episode, Krillin fails, while Vegeta keeps screaming at him to hit it harder.
- Krillin on the receiving end of Za Warudo.
Krillin Gohan! Did you see? His power, he can-! |
- Vegeta's hurricane of Unusual Euphemisms as The Stinger of Episode 19.
"Son of a gum-chewing funk monster! Why the fruit does all this funny stuff happen to me? Forget my life! Always surrounded by miserable failing clods! It's like this whole world just likes to bend me over and find me in the Alps! Like I'm some sort of sh lock receptacle! Well as far as I care, these miserable cows can have a fancy barbecue, WITH A GODDAMN PIG!" |
- Go Space Broncos!
- "Why can't I feel my everything?"
- Guldo getting dog biscuits thrown at him.
- Or Vegeta's advice to Krillin on how to fight him:
Vegeta: Throw dog biscuits at him. |
- And finally, Guldo's Facing the Bullets One-Liner, as he realises he is dying, and begins to contemplate his afterlife and what it all means... before Vegeta throws another dog biscuit at him.
Guldo: ...I f***ing hate you. |
- "Sure is Zarbon in here."
Episode 20[]
- The Ginyu Force mourns Guldo.
Jeice: Oy... is that Guldo? I think he's dead! |
- After Recoome's first Badass Boast:
Vegeta: Wrestling's fake. (boos and jeers) Oh, go to hell, all of you! And if it means getting this damn thing over with, then I'm just going to have to kill your ass! Now hit my music.
Vegeta: Oh, the f*** with this! |
- While it might be funny only to wrestling fans, Jeice using "slobberknocker" and "vintage" while commentating is quite hilarious.
- This bit after Krillin got owned for the 12th time:
Krillin: HELLO GOHAN, HAVE YOU DONE YOUR HOMEWORK BECAUSE IF YOU DIDN'T CHI CHI WILL KICK MY ASS! |
- Dende feeling sad that he's one of the few Namekians alive.
Guru: (monotone singing) Every party needs a pooper, that's why they invited you. Party pooper. Party pooper. |
- "Silly Vegeta! The only thing Recoome sells, is merchandise!" *Cue images of merchandise with Recoome on them popping up, including a vibrator with his head*
- After Gohan and Krillin have saved Vegeta by forcing Recoome's mouth shut while he was using his Breath Weapon:
Recoome: (his mouth is all messed up) Can Recoome get a mirror? He feels like he might have chipped a tooth. |
- The entire Spacey's skit. It's good food. In Space.
DBZ Abridged - Episodes 21-[]
Episode 21[]
- "WE GET IT! YOU'RE FROM SPACE AUSTRALIA!!!"
- Episode 21, Jeice getting punched in the face over and over again is enough to make you fall down laughing.
- Especially when he tries to think about what Ginyu said to do in that situation...only for Goku to punch him again mid-flashback. Jeice then holds his face and screams "Oh, he cut off the captain!"
- Jeice can't rely on his squadmates either:
Jeice: Alright, you bastard! Prepare to face the wrath of the Ginyu For*punch* AHH! You goddamn wanker! You punched me right in the*punch* Ah, he did it again! *punch* Ahh! Stop it! Stop it! *punch* PISS!!! Oh... what would the captain do in this situation?! |
- Jeice and Burter have a touching display of camaraderie, showing how good friends they are and promising to go out drinking once its all over, the music swells... and Goku one-shots Burter.
- Freeza's rant: "I can't believe we came all the way out here and spent a week in the Space Boonies for nothing! Seriously, I'm surprised we didn't hear banjos on the way, because everyone is inbred and LOOKS THE F***ING SAME! Not to mention I lost Dodoria and Zarbon, the latter of whom spent 400 credits making long-distance calls to his girlfriend, WHO I AM CONVINCED IS NAMED CHUCK!"
- This.
Freeza: (After Ginyu has brought him the Dragon balls and finished the Dance of Joy, which was authorized by Freeza's father) Now, let's wish me some immortality! |
- After the Dragon Balls don't work.
Ginyu: "Might I suggest the dance of cheering you up?" |
- "And now, the Dance of Solitude!"
- "You think that's bad? If you hit 'em hard enough you can play a song." Cue Vegeta playing the Tetris theme by repeatedly kneeing Burter in the throat.
- Vegeta's Renegade Interrupt.
- Gohan is fed a senzu bean. a green 9999 appears over his head and the healing ding plays.
- "Silly Gohan! Animals don't eat people - people eat animals! Silly Gohan!"
- Vegeta's excuse about being so beat up:
Goku: So Vegeta, what happened to you? Did you get beat up by this guy? (talking about Recoome) |
Episode 22[]
- Episode 22: Another great Guru line - "And so I tell him, 'I don't care who you are, now clean my jowls!' ...And that was Nail's first day on the job." Then, after Guru unlocks Dende's potential, Dende leaves. Guru's response? "Thaaaat SLUUUUUUUUUTTT!!"
- Also from 22:
Guru: NNAAAAAIIIILLLL! Do we have a visitor? |
- KILLING CRABS! IN THE OCEAN!
Krillin: "When the dragon balls are all put together, the sky grows darker than the blackest void!" |
- Later, when Freeza is going to Guru:
Freeza: (passing Dende) "Good afternoon." |
- "Oh god. NATURAL LIGHT!"
- "I utilize these poses as a means of reinvigorating my men and raising morale. HOW DARE YOU MOCK THEM!"
- Ginyu meeting Goku
Jeice: That's him, Captain! That's the one who beat us up! |
- Nail again demonstrating his aptitude at passive-aggressive trash talk:
Freeza: You see, I recently acquired what you people referred to as Dragon Balls, but I'm having trouble getting them to do what I want. |
- Which leads too...
Guru: Naaail, what does he want? |
- After Freeza sees Guru for the first time:
Freeza: Good Lord! I was lead to believe your species survived almost entirely on water! How is he so fat?! |
- That's... a good question, actually.
- Becomes Fridge Horror when you remember the mention of a Namik suffering a terrible drought during Guru's reign.
- That's... a good question, actually.
- (re: the Ginyu Force's defeat)
Captain Ginyu: Did (Recoome) at least die with dignity? |
- This exchange:
Jeice: Well, cap'n, if you're getting stressed, you could always... ya know... |
Episode 23[]
- Krillin and Gohan discussing why the Namekian Dragon Balls aren't working.
Gohan: Maybe there's something special about Namekian Dragon Balls. |
- Bulma calling out Krillin and Gohan on leaving her alone all the time, and Krillin pointing out the logic of her problem:
Bulma: Why?! Why would you leave me alone here?! I don't know this place! Did you know there are giant crabs down there?! I do! I KILLED ONE! |
- Also in episode 23:
Freeza: (to Nail) Oh, I know. How bout a good old-fashioned joke? How many Namekians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Their whole race. One to screw in the lightbulb, and the rest to die. And then the other one dies too. |
- Freeza is just terrible, in the funniest way possible.
Freeza: So. We've been flying for about twenty minutes now. Got any family? Because if so I probably killed them. |
- "Stop ignoring me."
- Vegeta imagining himself yelling "Team Three Star" just before breaking Krillin's neck.
"Amazing." |
- Two soldiers talking about the Wilhelm scream and trying to imitate it. Vegeta then knocks one to his death, which makes him do the real deal.
Soldier: Dude, that was totally it! (dies, emitting the scream as well) |
- Made even funnier when after that, everyone else very clearly also has a stock scream... of Team Fortress 2 characters. Also after the slaughter:
Vegeta: (jumping into Freeza's base, deadpan) Weeeeeeee. |
- Ginyu!Goku getting confused about who is in whose body.
Ginyu!Goku: (After Goku!Ginyu flies off) Man... I'm a jerk now... |
- Vegeta's answer to Ginyu's request for a moment of silence.
Ginyu: Just...just allow me a customary moment of silence.
Vegeta: Mine mine mine minemineMINEMINEMINEMINEMINE! (Bashes Ginyu!Goku into the ground.) |
- Gohan's snapped rage which doubles as Calling the Old Man Out.
Krillin: Gohan, we might have a chance now! But you have to give it your all! Remember, (Ginyu) may look like your dad, you can absolutely not hold back- |
- This line:
Goku!Ginyu: This is easily the second worst hole I've had in my chest. It's going to take, like, a million mommy kisses to make this feel better. |
Episode 24[]
- Episode 24 is crammed with funny moments:
- Freeza and Nail's confrontation:
Nail:(attacks Freeza mid-sentence) HAAAAA! |
- In their next scene, there's a whole pile of mutilated arms on the ground.
Freeza: How many arms do you think we're up to? I think we're up to 24. |
- Vegeta, Gohan, and Krillin taking Goku to the healing tank in the ship:
Vegeta: It'll take a while, though. This is the only other model the ship has. And it's kind of an old one. |
- Krillin and Gohan lampshading how long they've been on Namek.
Krillin: You know, Gohan. It just occurred to me. |
- Krillin unintentionally giving Vegeta flashbacks from the previous season:
Krillin: Hey, by the way, don't I look like that one guy that Vegeta landed with back on Earth? What was his name, again? Hey, Vegeta! What was that one guy's name? Vegeta? Vegeta? Vegeta? Vegeta? (Nappa's head appears) Vegeta? Vegeta? |
- George Takei randomly interrupting the conversation between Goku and King Kai:
Goku: Who's that, King Kai? |
- Dende starts screaming in terror when he thinks he's been caught by one of Freeza's henchmen. Then he realizes it's Krillin, and he screams even louder.
- Gohan's inner monologue as he reflects on his life:
Gohan: Then again, I don't really know anyone my own age. My best friends are a 26 year-old dwarf, and a giant green alien who constantly hits me. Still, better than my dad. At least they're around . ...Huh. Where did that come from? |
- Porunga's introduction:
Krillin: Holy crap, your dragon's on steroids! |
- King Kai communicating with Krillin:
King Kai: Stop screwing around and wish these idiots off my planet! |
- No one cares what Yamcha thinks!
- Piccolo's reaction to being sent to a random spot on Namek:
Krillin: Little Green, wish our friend Piccolo back to life, and then with our next wish, bring him to Namek. |
- Apparently, Goku was right; Vegeta does have a very nervous bladder.
Vegeta: (suddenly wakes up, jumps to his feet, fists clenched) I have to pee! (bolts out of the room) |
- It also takes him way too long to figure out why the sky has turned dark; "Jesus, I overslept. It's already night...for the first time since I got here...on a planet with three suns." (Alarm clock in his head ticks, then goes off after several seconds) "Oh you mother-(cut back to the dragon)-FUCKERS!" But when he does...
Krillin: (on what he should use the third wish for) Well, now I can have a three-foot-long... |
- Guru's death and how well it fits with his character:
Guru: I feel that they have finally summoned the dragon. Would be a reeeal dick move to die right now...Huuurrkk [dies] |
- When Kami is resurrected.
Popo: -humming and watering plants- |
- Even better given it's a brick joke to this http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zOVORQzNmrM&feature=related
- Freeza's reaction to learning that the Namekians have hoodwinked him.
Nail: (Enjoying this moment) The earthlings have the password. |
- Vegeta's thoughts as he was falling asleep.
Vegeta: First immortality. Then the bitches. |
- The reveal that even Krillin thought the name "Team Three Star" was stupid.
- That seemed more like he was trying to save face than anything else, considering how enthusiastic he was about it in the beginning.
- Freeza getting annoyed with Namek. Again.
Nail:(Lands on a random spot) This is my people's sacred battleground. |
Episode 25[]
- The Stinger has the theme song with Freeza under a powerup box. Out pops the mushroom and Freeza transforms.
- Episode 25 has several including Freeza raising the Owned count so high that he gets a 1Up, Nappa in the flashback and Dodoria shopped onto a fat woman in lingerie during a solar flare.
- Freeza singing a modded rendition of "My Favorite Things" in 25, is both hillarious and chilling.
Freeza: Peaceful young races with fires on their houses, millions of voices all silenced like mouses, watching the cowards bow toward their new king, these are the few of my favorite things! |
- Another is the aftermath of Piccolo's fusion with Nail. Team Four Star handles it EXACTLY like the dub complete with Piccolo psyching himself up...until...
Nail, (inside Piccolo's head): What are you doing? |
- When Freeza's still in his first form, locked in a power struggle with Vegeta, his scouter displays the message "F**K THIS. I'M OUT." seconds before exploding.
- During the flashback about Bardock's warning:
- When Dende heals Gohan.
Gohan: I... you... healed me. |
- When Gohan's Roaring Rampage of Revenge after Freeza (almost) kills Krillin fails.
Gohan: Think, what would dad do? |
- When Krillin comes back in top form after being impaled:
Vegeta (inner monologue): I swear if he used that wish for immortality on himself, I am going to murde- |
- SOCIAL ACTIVITYYYYY!
- While Freeza is owning Krillin so much he gets a 1UP...
Gohan: Krillin, stop! You're making him stronger! |
- Krillin tells the gang how he blinded Freeza with Solar Flare;
Gohan: And then you used your Ki-Enzan to cut him in half? |
- Krillin learns that he isn't immortal.
Krillin: Wait, you mean I could have actually died? |
- Piccolo's Big Damn Heroes moment is accompanied by Magus' battle music. [2]
- Nail explains his plan to Piccolo.
Nail: There's a special ability our people share. Forbidden, even amongst our most sacred clans. |
- Freeza "taunting" Vegeta while he tortures Gohan
Freeza: So Vegeta, does this get you angry? |
- Piccolo's first thoughts on Namek;
"What was that idiot doing, bringing me here? It's- Wait a minute. I can feel it. This is my home! I can finally see its beauty! The lush blue fields... The crystal clear waters... The wind brushing past my GOD this is boring! Huh...no wonder I feel right at home. |
- How Vegeta knew that Freeza can transform.
Vegeta: Guldo told me |
Episode 26[]
- The miraculous return of the Kanassans:
Kanassan 1: I CAN SEE THE FUTUUUUUURE! |
- The Stinger has this exchange:
Krillin: Little Green! NOOOOOOOO!!! |
- A brilliant send up of of the series' "weighted clothing" concept:
Piccolo: Don't think you have the upperhand yet. I'm still wearing weighted armour! |
- After Krillin sees Piccolo crack his knuckles and neck in a truly awesome way.
Krillin: Aw man that sounded good, now I have to do my neck. [SNAP] OWWW MY NECK! [Krillin Owned Count: 26] |
- Piccolo and Nail's conversation during Freeza's 2nd transformation.
- For some reason, this troper finds the exchange after Freeza transforms into his 3rd form hilarious.
Freeza: So Namekian, what do you think of my 3rd form? |
- Definitely this exchange:
Freeza: I have a question for you though. |
- When Vegeta tried fleeing, this happened:
Freeza: *suddenly appears* So, Vegeta, where do you think you're going? |
- Extra funny if you realize a similar joke was made 23 episodes earlier.
- Freeza's "game"
Freeza: How about this? Let's play a game. Ever hear of paintball? |
- Plus the exchange right afterward that would later be alluded to in episode 29.
Freeza: Now for your other glubok! (He blasts Piccolo again.) |
Episode 27[]
- The opening.
Goku: I'm sure they're doing just fine. |
- Before that, Goku was singing "Put the Lime in the Coconut".
- Freeza's continued mocking
Freeza: It's like putting down Old Space Yeller |
- The return of "DOOOOOOOOOOODGE!!"
- Goku's attempt at a Badass Boast.
Goku: I'm Goku! I'm insane, from Earth! |
- And then Freeza's comment:
Freeza: Well between you and the Namekian I think I've lost my touch at genocide. |
- A good amount of the dialogue in episode 27, such as the round of "Row row row your boat". Especially once Goku arrives and starts talking to Freeza.
- Note that the singing round includes King Kai and Tien, but cuts off before Yamcha. Priceless.
- Meta example in that shortly before the episode's release, The Nostalgia Critic reviewed Star Trek V: The Final Frontier, which had an infamous scene of Kirk and McCoy singing Row Row Row Your Boat. KaiserNeko noted this coincidence on Twitter.
- Vegeta attempting to rock Freeza like a hurricane. It fails.
Huh, I should've known that was only a one-hit wonder. |
- After Goku blocks Freeza's Beam Spam attack, Freeza demands to know how it's possible, from Vegeta, who's been talking about the Super Saiyan legend the whole episode, and previous ones (having already given an identical speech about it twice). Mostly in relation to himself, but you can tell Freeza sees it coming again. Each word out of Freeza's mouth is angrier than the last in the following exchange.
Vegeta: You see, Freeza? You aren't dealing with the average Saiyan warrior anymore- |
- EVERYTHING that the extremely short-lived Jamaican (That sounds familiar to Sebastian the Crab) crab (Apparently his name is 'Orpheus') says before getting eaten by Freeza in Episode 27.
- When Goku arrives, he talks to the others. This happens.
Goku: Oh, hey Piccolo! When'd you come back? |
- And then he turns to Freeza:
Goku: So, are you that Freezer guy? |
- And note that this is actually a Brick Joke to how Freeza keeps track of every Badass Boast made towards him.
- Freeza explains why Vegeta is injured;
Freeza: Unfortunately, Vegeta and I had a disagreement. He wanted himself to live, and, well, I didn't. |
- During their, ah, fight, Vegeta and Freeza's thoughts.
Vegeta: (Yes I have him on the ropes! All he can do is dodge me!) |
- Early on when Gohan, Krillin and Piccolo are all certain of their defeat and Vegeta keeps boasting how good he is:
Krillin: I couldn't even follow that attack! It was almost instantaneous! |
- I know the whole scene with Freeza curb stomping Vegeta is pretty morbid, but I always find it humorous when Krillin asks if they should do something
Freeza: (Appears) Oh, go ahead, pool's open; water's fine. (Everyone just stands there, shaking in their boots) No? Just going to stand there like a bunch of piss ants? Thought so. |
- After Freeza tells Vegeta that a Super Saiyan is just a myth...
Vegeta: Bitch, you just jealous of my Super Saiyan swagger. |
- While firing an impressive but ineffective Beam Spam, Vegeta yelling "DAKKA DAKKA DAKKA DAKKA!"
Episode 28[]
- The opening, which has Vegeta stating the usual legal stuff, but clearly dying with each breath.
- Vegeta's dying words.
Vegeta: You are our race's last hope. You are the last remaining Saiyan. ...Oh god, you're the last remaining Saiyan. |
- Freeza's complete stupification as he tries to comprehend how Goku thinks.
Goku: Wow, that was close! I was almost out of the frying pan, and into the... lava. |
- After kicking Freiza into a mountain, the two exchange banter. Goku gets in a legitimate taunt.
- And actually thanks his brain for coming up with it.
- All of the ensuing fight between Goku and Freeza... as Freeza gradually loses it from exposure to Goku's stupidity.
- Half the fun is Goku taking Freeza's thinly-veiled threats and taunts at face value.
- Vegeta tells Goku that your clothes don't come with you when you die. Goku says his stayed with him.
Vegeta: That lying red motherfucker! |
- The random moment with Bulma shows her drinking the planet's water.
Bulma: Oh God! That was so refreshing... too bad it was all saltwater though. (faints). |
Goku: My butt is flaming! |
- Krillin getting hit in the face with Freiza's puke, bringing the Krillin Owned Counter up to 27.
- When Goku says to Freeza that he won the game because he fought without his shirt (long story). He asks what his prize is.
Goku: What do I win?
Freeza: Just tell me when you need to come up for air. |
- The following exchange, just after Vegeta's burial. Freeza's expression while saying the last line is priceless:
Freeza: Come now, I'm sure he's in a better place... Oh, who am I kidding? He's probably in Hell! |
- Freeza, after Goku responds to his rhetorical question with a rhetorical answer.
Freeza: ...Good lord, I traded Vegeta for this. |
- Goku's brain appearing to be voiced by Orson Welles, at least if its garbled comments about "frozen peas" while Goku is drowning were any indication.
- Vegeta's spirit animal falling out of Freeza's ear.
- The beginning;
Goku: Vegeta, no! |
- Goku bites Freeza's tail. 'Nuff said.
- Goku continuing to be a terrible father.
Goku: Piccolo, you take care of Gohan. |
- Freeza asking if Goku wants to play a "game".
- After the "pinball" game:
Freeza: So how did you like that game, monkey? |
- Why Vegeta got shot;
Goku: Vegeta, are you all right? |
- Freeza loses his patience with Goku.
Freeza: How do you function? |
- The end of the episode
Freeza: (still holding Goku under the water) Any last words, monkey? Besides "gurgle gurgle?" |
Episode 29[]
- The disclaimer is read by Krillin, followed by this gem of an exchange.
Director: That was perfect, Krillin. Don't worry about your check, we'll send it to your next of kin. |
- Freeza after pulling Goku out of the water
Freeza: Now what do you have to say for yourself, monkey? |
- The entire bit with the Ginyu Force on King Kai's planet. Including lines from Yamcha.
Yamcha: [King Kai's training] is bogus! |
- King Kai's casual reaction to the tree Guldo threw at his house.
King Kai: Hey, I was just inside, taking a crap, I'm old, takes a while, come out, there's a tree in my living room... What's up? |
- And when the Ginyus get kicked down to hell by King Kai:
Goz: Meeeeez! We havez visitaaaaars! Prepare ze campz. |
- This exchange:
Goku: No, I can't lose. I have to beat you. You're evil, and you have to be stopped! |
- Freeza's frustration at not understanding what Goku's up to with the Spirit Bomb. "There you go again, throwing your hands up in the air like you just don't care. Care, damn it!"
- Freeza gets hit by the Spirit Bomb
Freeza: (in a calm tone despite the look of horror on his face) ...Oh. Somehow I completely forgot about that. |
- The Call Back to Piccolo having Goku distract Raditz while Goku is charging the spirit bomb. This time, the positions are reversed.
Piccolo: Did you just hold a grudge? |
- And just like Piccolo, Goku sang a song while Piccolo was getting a beatdown. The song was, again, Mahna Mahna.
- I'ma charging my attack.
- If you listen carefully the beatdown, Piccolo said "Ow, my glubok!"
- And just like Piccolo, Goku sang a song while Piccolo was getting a beatdown. The song was, again, Mahna Mahna.
- As Goku brings the Spirit Bomb down on Freeza, who was charging a world-ending attack.
- Freeza's reappearance: "By the way, not dead. Kthanx DIE."
- When Freeza kills Krillin after taking out Piccolo:
Krillin: (After seeing Piccolo taken out) Oh, for a moment I thought that was going to be me.
Krillin: AAAH! AAAH! AAAH! AAAH! AAAH! *explodes*
*Krillin's Owned Count goes to 28* |
- The stinger, after Freeza kills Krillin:
Mr. Popo: (dramatic closeup) CALLED IT. |
- Freeza finally loses his cool.
Freeza: That's stupid! You're stupid! Stop being stupid! |
- "RECOOOOOOOOOOOMEEE! DIIIIIIIIIIVEEEEE!
- After Guldo throws the tree at King Kai's house:
Burter: Whoa, little quick to the trigger there, Ace! |
- Freeza spotting the huge spirit bomb above him.
Freeza: What is that glare? That's not a sun, it's not a moon and it's certainly not a space station - what is that? (looks up) What... is... that - What is that!? |
- Also, Krillin keeps blurting out what Goku's doing, and how strong the Spirit Bomb is.
Piccolo: Shut up! |
DBZ Abridged - Episodes - Other[]
- This is the best song ever.
- Nappa's year-long Are We There Yet?, which at first seems to come to a rather anticlimactic end ("Yay!") only to be brought back in a wonderfully unexpected way: "Is he here yet?"
- They turned Recoome into The Rock.
- He's a mash-up of the Rock, Hulk Hogan, and John Cena in one ball of wrestling hilarity.
- Apparently, as episode 20 shows, Goku is Hulk Hogan.
- And then there's this:
Gohan I swear, I don't even know what's going on anymore. |
- Guru has two words for everyone.
Guru: Drop it! |
DBZ Abridged - Movies and Specials[]
- And now from the "Bardock - Father of Goku Abridged" we have the following:
Nappa: (to Vegeta) I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship! |
- Also from the Bardock special:
Bardock: Hey there, Kakarrot. It's your daddy! Let's see what kind of power level we've got here... Alright, whoa ho ho ho! Ten-thousand! That's my boy! *sees name plaque* ...Wait, Broly...? |
- Even better is the set-up to that. Bardock at first doesn't give a damn when the doctor asks if he wants to see Goku, noting that he never paid attention to Raditz when he was growing up. The doc answers, "And we all know how he turned out," followed by a Gilligan Cut to the above line.
- Another from the Bardock special:
Gohan: Someone threw out a perfectly good baby! I think I'll name you... Clark. |
- Bardock witnessing the future of his son
KakarotGoku... from a scene from Dragon Ball GT. "....And now I welcome the sweet embrace of death."- "Well, I'd say I should've seen this coming, but that would be ironic."
- "USELESS-ASS PSYCHIC POWERS!!!"
- Mr. Popo's cameo as Bardock first gets his ability to see the future.
- This exchange
Dodoria: I think that Bardock's a pretty cool guy. |
- The whole exchange between Nappa and young Prince Vegeta.
Nappa: Vegeta! |
- The Halloween Special:
Professor: Well, what's your costume? |
- Four Words: Banana on a
tricycleunicycle.- Heck, the entire FAQ is one big CMOF.
- The obnoxious salaryman... er, fan. That is all.
Obnoxious Fan: Can I be Cutter? |
- Also-
Obnoxious Fan: Can I be Oozaru? |
- Nappa answering the question of who writes and edits the show.
Nappa: The editing is done by Tigerkitty! |
- The AWA special:
Nappa: Hey. Vegeta. Check out that cosplayer over there. They're hot! |
- In the middle of the Conneticon 2011 announcement.
Announcer: ...wait a minute, this is missing something. Hey Nappa, say something funny. |
- Nappa and the other bald characters' parody of Lady Gaga's Born This Way.
- After the music stops, some of the reactions are priceless:
Nappa: Tien, what are you doing?! That was your line! |
- The entirety of "Christmas Tree of Might." Especially the end.
Vegeta: This is so non-canon, it hurts. |
- The "mouth present" thing.
Goku: Well, what am I getting for Christmas? |
- And later...
(Gohan is transformed into a Great Ape) |
- The wish Krillin makes which causes the events of the special. Thank you, Krillin and thank you Shenron.
- Shenron's jackassness is hilarious.
Shenron: No! No way! No, not you again! HAS IT EVEN BEEN A YEAR?! |
- Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bell ROCK THE DRAGON, DRAGON BALL Z!
- This:
Piccolo: Bitch, you look like Goku. |
- Goku singing while Chi-Chi is lecturing Gohan.
Chi-Chi: Goku, stop that or I'll deck you in the halls! |
- "Did I just smash the Krampus?"
- "FalalalalalalalaDIE."
- "YOU NEVER WASTE FIGGY PUDDING!" *beatdown ensues*
- Goku's attempt to reason with the tree.
Goku: Big tree, if you don't leave right now, I'm going to beat you up. |
- Yamcha's "fight" with Cacao:
Cacao: Singing:Yamcha the Scarfaced Bandit. |
- Turles' rant against Christmas in front of Gohan, mainly because of the voice, the way he was speaking, and who he is quoting.
- Also the previous, nefarious misdeeds of his mooks, including raping Rudolph.
From the Lord Slug movie, we have Piccolo's interaction with Slug's minions.
Piccolo: Alright, what's your gimmick?
Dorodabo: HEY! You son of a bitcccccccccccch! |
- The truck returns in this gem delivered after Goku has been impacted into the ground like a vegetable.
Slug: You know, there's a certain sport I excel at. |
- After Piccolo rips his own ears off in order to avoid being affected by Gohan's whistling, he keeps yelling "WHAT?" everytime he thinks someone is talking to him, even when nobody's talking back. He later combines it with the Kaïoken Running Gag:
Goku: Kaïoken! |
- It's doubly funny coupled with the fact Piccolo's Big Damn Heroes moment was accompanied by Stone Cold Steve Austin's theme music; later in his career "WHAT?" became something of a catchphrase for him.
- Also comes back during the credits.
- Vegeta watches Krillin get pasted on TV and records the moment.
Vegeta: And the Emmy goes to... |
- Goku thinking it's Christmas for most of the movie. Because it's snowing!
- "I AM CHAMPION CHRISTMAS!"
- Piccolo and Nail's conversation at the begining of the movie. (Nail is in Piccolo's head, even though he wouldn't have been at the time, but the movie doesn't really fit into continuity anyway.)
Piccolo: The Kamehameha doesn't drill things! |
- How Goku seems more worried about trivial things when landing on Iguana Street, than the actual fight.
Goku: Aw great Iguana Street, now I'm gonna get mugged. But the joke's on them! I have no mo-*Gets punched through wall.* |
- The Overly Long Gag where Dorodabo repeatedly gets knocked off a building by Piccolo.
- Goku's song while charging the Spirit Bomb.
Goku: Sun, sun, Mr. Golden Sun, kill my enemies! |
- Piccolo's master plan against Lord Slug:
Piccolo: *standing on Slug's head* Hey. Name's Piccolo. I've got your antennae! Whatcha gonna do about it, huh? |
- Medamatcha in general.
"Papa Medamatcha gonna make you his bitch!" |
- Everything he says is hilarious.
- Squeaky Toy!Goku returns!
Slug: My god, that's hilarious! |
- This exchange.
- Toolo: "I CAN SEE THE FYOOO-CHURRRR!!!!!!"
- Yamcha the Scar Faced Bandit. Particularly when Krillin manages to smack talk him.
- Dragonball Z Kai Abridged, the entirety of season 1 condensed into two minutes and ten seconds of nonstop hilarity.
Krillin: Yamcha's here! [Explosion] Yamcha's dead! |
Vegeta: Hey Nappa. Let's go to Earth. |
- The part where Nappa sums up his total reason for being;
Nappa: Vegeta why?! (as he is dying) |
- The Yomacon commercial;
Guru: Nail...Nnnnnail! |
- ↑ According to an interview from the Daizenshuu EX podcast, that joke was apparently planned almost from the beginning, making pretty much the entire first season a set-up to get to that punchline. Hence the name of the finale "The Punchline".
- ↑ You know, cause Magus and Piccolo look similar as both were designed by Akira Toriyama. Plus, Magus was the Fiendlord, and Piccolo Senior was the Demon King.