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  • Most anything Dave says but especially: "It's not a fucking school play production. It's the bird." (Dave to the guys when trying to show them how to flip someone the bird).
  • Flight of the Conchords has a number of these, but this is one of the best:

 Sinjay (threatingly): I'm going to count to 10!

(awkward silence)

Jermaine: Are you counting in your head?

Sinjay: Yes.

Jermaine: What number are you up to?

Sinjay: Seven.

(Jermaine and Bret run away)

  • Murray telling the guys about when he was in the New Zealand army, while in fort they made in their bedroom.

 Murray: And one time... my whole platoon had to drink their own urine.

Bret: Oh, were you lost?

Murray: No, we were drunk. It was a party game. I didn't really like that part of the army. More tea, Jemaine?