Snicket Warning Label/Quotes

"And they lived Happily Ever After," my father said. "Wow," I said. He looked at me. "You're not pleased?" "No, no, it's just, it came so quick, the ending, it surprised me. I thought there'd be a little more, is all. I mean, was the pirate ship waiting or was that just a rumor like it said?" "Complain to Mr. Morgenstern. 'And they lived happily ever after' is how it ends." The truth was, my father was fibbing. I spent my whole life thinking it ended that way, up until I did this abridgment. Then I glanced at the last page. —The Princess Bride

Lemony Snicket: "And so, the Baudelaire Children went to Peru, and together had many wonderful adventures with their loving and caring Uncle. The End." These are the words I so desperately wish to write. I would love nothing more than to say the Children found a new home. However it is not my place to weave happy endings where they do not occur, but to report the actual series of events. And I'm sorry to say the Children's troubles were only beginning. —A Series of Unfortunate Events (The Film)