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- "Good morning!" ... "You SUCK!"
- "This story is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to names, places and incidents is purely coincidental."
- "Snow... where's the snow... *pause* WHY THE HELL WOULD WE HAVE ANY SNOW?!"
- "You have such nice breasts. Just the kind I like. Do you mind if I play with them for a bit? May I run my fingers along your body? —Just as I thought, you don't speak any Helvetian."