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File:Vocations-Poster-2011 3175.jpg

Go on, pet it. You know you want to.

Stationery Voyagers is an allegorical, melodramatic dry pastiche Science Fiction serial Space Opera book (and hopefully, also eventually TV) series in development by Dozerfleet Productions (Yes, that Dozerfleet!)

A team of anthropomorphic writing utensils is assembled to embark on diplomatic recon missions. Their goal: to prevent widespread imperialism in their star system. Only problem is, they find themselves accidental heroes destined to battle an even bigger scheme by an ancient evil which threatens the eternal damnation of their entire universe. But it's not like they had any good alternatives.

Floating around the Internet since 2009, two minisodes have been published online: "The Wages of Cheating Death" and "Ties That Confide." The latter became the inspiration behind a wedding slideshow video dubbed "Ties That Confide: Reception Wishes." Most episodes are not yet published, due to its creator keeping them on a hard drive until they are ready for publication in large volume book format as "seasons."

The Voyagers' universe involves a very philosophy-laden deity named Minshus, who due to the paradoxes of love, is forced by his own nature to allow its opposites a chance to come into form on their own, if only temporarily. Due to this, a third of his Apthalans rebel and get their own universe. Outer Reality is defined as three universes, two that are perfect spheres that represent Heaven and Hell, while the third is shaped like an inverted onion and dubbed "Physicalia, the Great Testing Ground."

Several events similar to their Genesis counterparts happen, but instead of a Tower of Babel, there's a battle amongst tribes against the dreaded Drisalian Cult. One tribe stays behind to populate Mantith as mankind. The defeated members of Drisalius' cult are transformed into the hideous, bobcat-like Drismabons, and exiled to the dark world of Drizad. The tribes that ran away from the very beginning and tried to flee the battle are turned into Mosquatlons and Aviatets as punishment, and live in underground labyrinths and caves. The tribes that joined in on the fight once but then lost their courage and fled later had all become known for the creation of various writing utensils. They were thus exiled to the worlds of Statios, Markerterion, Whixtitout, and Neothode and transformed into creatures resembling writing tools, complete with a complex biology designed to work within those parameters and a sort of limited telekinesis called "phantomitics" that help them compensate for lacking arms and legs.

Fast forward thousands of years later, and things are a mess. Pirates under the leadership of Astrabolo are running amok, and trying to destroy everything from democracy to the institution of marriage and then some. FlatEarthAtheists in the very 70's-cultured Mantith are desperately trying to silence their Creationist critics before a tip can occur in the balance of cultural power. Under the influence of a mysterious Bedouin, Emperor Alhox of Markerterion has been convinced that the only solution to fighting Astrabolo is to pool resources by annexing all the other planets into his empire. Leading the charge in this is his Supreme General, Bluque.

The nation of Stato on the world of Statios won't stand for losing its sovereignty, and decides that creating its own sort of United Nations that involves a planetary scale is a better solution than being annexed to Markerterion, so they send a diplomatic recon team to argue the case to worlds where communication has not occurred until recently after a several-thousand-year hiatus. As the new astronaut team is about to discover though, they have more enemies than they thought possible.

Though many of its episodes remain in Development Hell, it has already developed a reputation amongst reviewers for having a high HSQ, and for often slamming head-first into Narm with its Refuge in Audacity and heavy-handed philosophy.

The series is told in the course of four "seasons," which are named Vocations, Repercussions, Surfaces, and Reconciliations, respectively.

Supplemental materials for the series can be read here. A video slideshow of artwork can be viewed here, and a fight scene between two Mosquatlons can be viewed here. A Character Sheet is already in the works.

Wannabe Trope Namer for the following:

This series contains examples of: