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The next time Doug loses his voice, Rob will take the Critic's place.
That or just do the talking. Because, lets face it, it's going to happen again and Doug seems to be running out of ideas. He's done one video mute, he's done a silent film, and he's called in Spoony and Linkara (and Microsoft Sam!))
Doug is dyslexic.
That would explain the more ridiculous of his spelling errors. Plus, he does say his spelling is like "crossing a dyslexic with a complete idiot." Doug is obviously not a complete idiot, so...
- He did see Penguin as misspelled when it wasn't and Rob didn't point it out, so maybe.
The Nostalgia Critic
The Nostalgia Critic is Clayton Forrester.
He's tall and skinny with a goatee. He changes his name often, and the place where he posts his videos is nondescript.
He's Doctor Forrester. He's showing us these horrible '80s/'90s movies to find the one that drives us insane, and thus use it to rule the world. His comments are because, after seeing Joel and Mike and the Bots "riff" on movies, he decided to try it himself.
This "The Bum" guy? He's what happened to Dr. Earhardt.
- So does that mean The Other Guy is TV's Frank?
- This makes some sense, but that's probably not why he's riffing. He's doing a series of controlled experiments to determine why and how riffing affects the experience of viewing bad cinema, and using the comments section under the video to gauge each experiment's effectiveness. Eventually, he will determine which collection of which clips of film is impervious to riffing; after splicing together a master reel, he will use that film to conquer the world. It's the best way to overcome the greatest weakness in his superweapon!
The Critic will become Dr. Forrester.
After years of the Critic seeing bad films, he loses it and becomes evil. Then he shows others (Joel, Mike, and the bots) what it felt like to be him.
The Nostalgia Critic and Roger Ebert are different reincarnations of the same Time Lord.
If NC is the first reincarnation, he has decided to continue review films, but want to do it in a more humorous way. If Ebert the first one, he has tiered of just reviewing bad films and decided to be a serious reviewer instead. But he stills unleashes colourful insults to bad films when he encounters them.
- If this is true, he's incredibly narcissistic. Also, they must be separated by several incarnations- going by the Doctor, they usually don't like their immediate successor. And NC loves Ebert.
The Nostalgia Critic sold his soul to the Devil
...a.k.a. Teddy Ruxpin. Well, think about it. At the end of the Halloween '08 special, that demon bear ostensibly killed the Critic; how else would you come out of a conflict with Satan except by selling your soul? Further proof: the number of times he's come back to life. Sure, Optimus Prime brought him back once, but the sheer number of times he's died and come back is absurd. It's even lampshaded by Chester A. Bum in his review of the fight. We really see the fruits of this little deal later on, in the Final Battle with The Angry Video Game Nerd, when the Critic, well, shoots lightning and resembles the devil, with no real explanation. He then resembles a different devil and bellows DIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE at the end of his Good Burger review, with, again, no real explanation.
Stretching the WMG a little further, at the end of the Nostalgia Critic's Top 11 Disney Villains, he puts Chernobog at Number 1, likely at the request of Teddy Ruxpin. It seems Teddy objected to the review anyway, most likely disliking the Nostalgia Critic's apparent pleasure at the heavenly light the devil is no match for; either that, or Teddy was objecting to the Critic saying that if the devil had a form, that's what he would look like, because that cute little creepy plush teddy bear really is the Devil's true form, which is of course why his computer was possessed at the end of the video.
- If this is the case, then his near-suicide is even more depressing. He's stuck either with his dead-end life, or Hell.
- And even if he didn't sell his soul to Teddy Ruxpin, he's either sold it to Sage or at the very least, can be controlled by him. Nobody deserves that.
The Nostalgia Critic is really Scout.
I'm not really sure what my reasoning is on this one, I was half-asleep and maybe a little drunk when I came up with this idea. They have similar hats and issues managing anger. I believe there was something about the respawn technology slowing the aging process and bringing the NC back on the multitude of times he's died. That's all I got.
The Nostalgia Critic is Kyon.
Put glasses, the hat, and a goatee on Kyon, you've got the Nostalgia Critic.
- So who's Haruhi? The Nostalgia Chick?
The Nostalgic Critic has a closet black guy fetish
The Critic is a CIA experiment gone horribly wrong.
Years ago, in a secret lab, a group of scientists attempted to make a young man named Doug into a fighting machine for the CIA. They kidnapped him from high school and subjected him to all kinds of mental tests, which included analysing information like films and images. However, Doug was quite sarcastic and cynical. In his cell-hotel-room...thing where the CIA kept Doug, was a TV. Doug watched a lot of TV, including film channels. One day, Doug was injected with a hormone to make him fly into a rage at the slightest provocation. Anything illogical or remotely frustrating caused Doug to spin wildly out of control. He escaped the film room and back to his cell, where Batman and Robin was playing on the TV. Doug, still under the effects of the drug, bore witness to the 'Bat Credit Card' scene. And something in him snapped. He began foaming at the mouth and screaming 'YOU BASTARDS! YOU GAVE MY HERO A BAT! CREDIT! CARD! I'LL FUCKING SNAP YOUR NECKS!' He stole a guard's gun and began shooting randomly, killing multiple CIA agents. Doug became a fugitive, and ran all the way back to his parents' house, where the drug wore off. But Doug was a changed man. In the years the CIA had him in their custody, Doug had aged and become more intelligent. Deciding that Doug was no longer his identity, he vowed to review the crappy things he had seen on his CIA TV, and much more (including Batman and Robin, which gave him an 'episode' later on), adopting the name 'The Nostalgia Critic', and using his new, CIA-trained powers for entertainment, not evil. The CIA did discover him at one point, and they recruited The Angry Video Game Nerd to assassinate the Critic, but the Critic survived, at which point the CIA just gave up and went on to very secretly sue Seth MacFarlane for American Dad! The Critic still suffers 'episodes' from his CIA treatment. These 'episodes' can be seen here, here, here, here, here, and here.
The Nostalgia Critic will become Gordon Freeman
Evident through the following: short hair, goatee and glasses for one. Also, he destroyed a DVD copy of The Neverending Story III with a crowbar, and sometimes he tends to lose his voice. Perhaps at a future review, he'd be at a rage so bad that he would lose his voice for good. After that, instead of watching shitty movies, he will move on to Theoretical Physics, go to MIT, and wind up working at Black Mesa after graduating.
The Critic will succumb to Alzheimer's when he's older
- Just because it would a total Ironic Hell for someone who devoted most of his time remembering stuff to not being able to remember anything anymore.
The Nostalgia Critic is a masochist.
He's said himself that the only thing he'd get out of The Lost World is that he's a glutton for punishment.
The Critic is manic-depressive
It would make sense. He can be heavily depressed, reasonably sane and mature, an excited little boy or completely batshit angry-crazy all in one episode.
The Critic used to have an Ultimatrix.
Doug was given one in an attempt to give Ben more help. Unfortunately, it was even less stable than Ben's, and glitched. Thus, he has his own human form, but carries mental traits from his Apoplexian form and explosive powers from a Prypiatosian.
The Nostalgia Critic is a fictional god-being.
That is to say, the Nostalgia Critic is a work of fiction, but exists in between the real world and fiction as a whole, as a God that transcends both fiction and reality. He has godlike control over all works of fiction, as long as they are crappy and he reviews them. This is where he gains his power. This also explains how the Critic survives life-threatening injury. He survives it if he wills himself to.
The Nostalgia Critic is Karkat Vantus in disguise as a human.
They both cuss like sailors, they're prone to frequent and infantile fits of rage, and neither Karkat nor the Nostalgia Critic like very many people that much. Let's face it, Nostalgia Critic basically has the spoken equivalent of Karkat's constant allcaps rage. But why has Karkat dropped internet trolling to review movies? Because he wants to show us all how awful the movies and shows from our human childhoods really were.
- I would say that Karkat is more like The Angry Video Game Nerd, seeing as they're both prone to making overly complex, detailed, and profane poop jokes.
Critic has bulimia
Obsessed with his looks? Check. Low self-esteem? Check. Gets unneeded Hollywood Pudgy crap from Fan Dumb? Check. Eats a bizarre amount of food? Check. Vomits a lot and easily? Check. Has a skinny frame but slightly puffy cheeks? Check.
The Critic's Past
The Nostalgia Critic was abandoned at the altar years ago.
Years ago, The Nostalgia Critic as a young boy had overprotective parents who refused to let him watch movies. Every time he says he enjoyed or disliked something as a kid, he's referring to something a friend showed him. When he grew up, he met a woman who was an amateur movie critic. They began dating, and every week, they would watch a bad movie together, making jokes about how bad it was. Eventually, they decided to get married, but That Guy, the Critic's Evil Counterpart kills her on the wedding day, leaving the Critic at the altar. Now, the Critic is bitter, still not knowing what happened to his fiancee all those years ago. Even to this day, however, now having learned what a good movie is, he continues their Bad Movie tradition in the form of movie reviews.
Alternatively, he was raped.
- In "Spooning With Spoony 2", he said that "This is just like my prom night!" This could mean that he was date-raped by someone. Perhaps it was a girl he liked, and didn't want to admit it because people wouldn't think it was rape.
The Critic has had a bad experience with holograms
- Which explains his REALLY shrill scream at Weebo's holographic lady in Flubber
His dad left at some point.
And by that I mean Daddy Critic, not Daddy Walker. Think about it, other than the Abusive Parents talk which involved both of them, he's mentioned his Dad once and that was only a line in the commercials special about what he would think. Which could also serve as a reason why he's so attached to his mom, even though she's been established as being just as horrible.
- Possible given what was said in the Alaska review.
- Judging by what he's said in earlier reviews, they very likely got divorced.
The Nostalgia Critic's parents are the parents of the magic gun.
His parents spoiled him.
To make up for their many, many shortcomings. He's mentioned begging them for anything he liked in a commercial, he loves Christmas (although still believes in Santa) but is never satisfied with his presents afterwards and they took him out for a nice meal whenever he got a A-.
The Other Guy spent most of time with nicer relatives of the family.
We know from Critic liking his granddad that nice-ish relatives exist and even though The Other Guy is an asshole with problems (like being proud to admit he's the Critic's puppet master), he's still much calmer and more responsible than his brother. So while Critic as a kid was in a constantly bad environment, he had a better childhood.
Daddy Critic had a Hair-Trigger Temper.
It would explain Critic's own childish temper tantrums, why he punished him so badly when he mouthed off once and why Critic clings to his mom (who in turn sounds like a Why Did You Make Me Hit You? kind of abuser).
- Relatedly, his far more masculine (far less endearing) persona might have been less Early Installment Weirdness and more trying to emulate his father. It can't have been a coincidence that Critic as we know him now started to solidify at the "first show he ever saw".
Critic and Ask That Guy's parents wanted twins, but not two boys.
Critic's pouted about growing up as a girl for a short time. Ask That Guy's complained about how dying with your parents would get them yelling at you to die more manly-like. Mommy and Daddy Glasses more than likely pushed them into the set gender roles when the boys didn't want to, thus setting them both up to be Sissy Villains.
He got attacked by a pedophile when he was little and is now repressing it.
Let's look at what he's said and how he's acted in the past. He says defensively that he was an early bloomer, he's desperate for any kind of attention and has had a generally unsafe sex life for a very long time, he's complained about being ugly as a child (so would want someone to like him), his parents did the sensible thing for a change and taught him about stranger danger, he was curious enough in the commercials to call suspected pedophiles and didn't hang up despite being disgusted, and in Hook he assumes everyone has repressed childhood memories. Plus, it would fit the Adult Fear-laden/Hilariously Abusive Childhood angle he's always taken.
Ask That Guy With The Glasses, The Nostalgia Critic and/or Chester A. Bum
That Guy With the Glasses, The Nostalgia Critic(s) and Chester A. Bum are all clones...
...of Douglas Walker. The status of their clone progenitor is unknown. But in the TGWTG 'verse, perfect human cloning exists (see Linkara's X-Men #424 review). This explains why NC, CAB and TGWTG can all be seen in the same conversation and why NC keeps coming back even after being killed several times. Or maybe Optimus Prime just likes dying for him :)
- "The Top 11 Mindfucks" video briefly shows multiple Critics in one shot. All a part of the mindfuckery, or evidence that this WMG is true? YOU DECIDE!
- They are all real and show up when they can disguise it as a mind fuck. This way secret remains!
- Since the TGWTG universe is shared with the AVGN universe, cloning must be possible, as he, too, has cloned himself in both the Nightmare on Elm Street and Oddysey reviews.
- The 'clones' in the NoES review existed only in his Krueger-controlled dream. BUT, the Nerd does seem to be a capable Mad Scientist, what with the FrankenNerd and the Nerdy Turd (from the aforementioned Odyssey review).
- By this extension, the Angry Video Game Nerd and Board James are clones of James Rolfe, with the Bullshit Man being created by a combination of James Rolfe's DNA and a bull's feces.
- The Childs Play review reveals the truth.
- Or alternatively, they are clones but Doug still exists, being the one who controls the site and appears at cons as himself. He also gives the serious counterpart to Bum Reviews. Thus explaining how they were all together in Kickassia and Suburban Knights.
The Nostalgia Critic, That Guy With The Glasses and Chester A Bum are all the same people.
But of different time periods. In the near future, the Critic will review a movie so irredeemably bad it wil make the Garbage Pail Kids movie seem decent by comparison. He will lose his f*** ing mind and become That Guy With The Glasses. Later he'll realise how horrible a person he's become and jump off a cliff. When he wakes up his brain will be damaged and with no money becomes Chester A Bum. The Future Nostalgia Critic is when Chester A Bum finally gets his CHANGE! and will have enough money to get a therapist. Thus reverting to his old self
Ask That Guy is the Critic's biological father.
It would explain why they look the same. For that matter, the Bum could be Ask That Guy's kid as well.
- It would explain the critic's crayon drawing...
Ask that Guy, Chester A Bum and the Nostalgia Critic are (or were) split personalities.
Specifically, of the original Doug Walker. In order to escape the abuse that life has given him, Mr Critic developed two different personalities. Ask that Guy essentially serves as an outlet for his more violent and disturbed actions, while the Nostalgia Critic provides an outlet for his cynicsm and Adult Child behaviour. The original personality became Chester A Bum, who, thanks to the other two personalities diverting all the pain and rage, became happy all the time.
However, several events would end up seperating the three. Ask that Guy became a more independent entity after selling his soul to the Devil, and gained the ability to gain a temporary physical form. This, combined with punches in time and hypertime destabilisation ended up fully seperating the three personalities. Now that the bonds are broken, their personalities have become more unstable.
Ask That Guy and Chester A Bum are future versions of the Critic, respectively.
The Critic is already one big woobie, and more than a little psychotic. In one timeline, the Critic broke down into despair due to his miserable life, and lost his job. In order to deal with this, he ended up taking a bunch of drugs, and get himself a whole new personality. This is why Chester loves every movie, even Twilight. On the other side of Hypertime, he plain old broke, had a Heel Face Turn and became Ask That Guy. Hence why Ask That Guy retains many character traits of the Nostalgia Critic, yet on a far more demented level.
Both Chester and Ask That Guy have been sent back in time by the other Channel Awesome crew. They want to ensure that neither side becomes the Critic's future, by scaring the Nostalgia Critic straight. The "future Critic" is in fact an Alternate Universe version of the Critic, from a world where his parents were actually decent people. He's in charge of this whole operation, and is writing wrongs in various universes. He's also the Champion of his universe, and was one of the first to fight off Lord Vyce.
The Critic, Ask That Guy, and Chester A Bum are brothers
Both the Critic and Ask That Guy had a Hilariously Abusive Childhood, with several notable similarities. Chester also seems to have had a rather bizarre past (if his "I (insert joke here) once!" lines are any indication). I think they suffered the same terrible childhood together and just deal with it differently.
Chester turned to drugs to forget his experiences, ending up as a homeless addict with so many confused memories that he honestly isn't sure what did and didn't happen to him any more.
Critic chooses to wallow in self pity, becoming a Jerkass Woobie in the process, and takes his frustration out on nostalgic movies and TV shows as a way of rebelling against his own childhood (hating not on his own experiences, but the entertainment from the period that reminds him of it). He also subconsciously tries to retroactively ruin the childhoods of others out of jealousy, by tearing down their pleasant memories of the past.
Ask That Guy...he quite simply went mad. Understandable, really.
Also, all three of them kinda look alike.
- Ask That Guy and Critic both being the brothers of That Other Guy was confirmed in ATG 68. Chester's probably a cousin.
Critic & Chick
Nostalgia Critic and Nostalgia Chick are secret long lost twins!
Just like He-Man and She-Ra! If they ever find out about it, then they are gonna be pissed.
Ma-Ti is actually a manifestation of The Nostalgia Critic's abused/abusive subconscious.
His history clearly shows he has seen a lot of terrible cartoons on television, but it were his memories on Captain Planet that created this "unimaginary friend" based on the character Ma-Ti. He simply made him up just so he could torture him and suppress his thoughts on those crappy toons. When this guy, now known as Nostalgia Critic, finally found a way to express his opinion on those cartoons through the website, Ma-Ti saw this as a clean shot to get back at him for all the years of endless mind torture.
- This would actually explain the strange scene in Kickassia where the Critic hallucinates finding the Review Room and being taunted by Ma-Ti, who materializes out of nowhere. That also gives just a little bit more hope, as getting called loyal strong means that there is a part of the Critic that likes himself.
Ma-Ti left the Planeteers on less-than-amiable terms.
If this troper had to guess, it involved being a Romantic Runner-Up, the matter of What Kind of Lame Power Is Heart, Anyway?, and/or the rest of the Planeteers Jumping Off the Slippery Slope at some point.
Ma-Ti will be brought back from the dead.
Douchey Mc Nitpick
Douchey McNitpick is Autistic
Or rather Douchey is one of those bastards that claim to have Asberger's on the net to gain sympathy while trolling.
Douchey McNitpick is why Death Is Cheap.
Douchey exists solely to be a troll. Through Noodle Implements, he stole a Lazarus Pit. He modified it so that being dunked in it wouldn't make you insane. Whenever the Nostalgia Critic is killed or kills himself, Douchey throws him into the pit, thus resurrecting him- so he can troll some more. Alternatively, he is the Grim Reaper in disguise, and doesn't bother to keep him dead for the same reason.
They both look similar and both scream 'Noooooooo!' in a whiny voice while flailing wildly. They both also seem obsessive in nature (Douchey picking out every little mistake with the Nostalgia Critic and John defending Tommy Wiseau's image).
Melvin, Brother of the Joker
After being "killed" at the charity drive, he simply went into hiding to avoid further vengeance for his suckitude. Plastic surgery fixed his scars, but to hide the rest of his features he took to wearing a mask. Now he torments Spoony as... Chuckles the Fucking Jester! Alternately, he was Chuckles first. Do you wanna know how he got those scars? Burton the Robot fired a laser at him while he was holding that CD in front of his face. As he runs off crying, you can see shards and quite a bit of blood coming from the area around his mouth.
Zack/Jack the Psycho Maniac
Zack the Psycho Maniac is NOT Zack the Lego Maniac.
In "Revenge of the Commercials", the Nostalgia Critic believes that Zack the Lego Maniac grew up to be Zack the Psycho Maniac, a mad bomber who attacks him at the end of the episode. Despite this assumption, they are not the same person. Zack the Lego Maniac, as seen at the 7:08 mark, likely grew up to be a completely different psycho: DOCTOR INSANO!
The Nostalgia Critic tries to review the Star Wars Holiday Special every year
It would explain why he didn't believe it existed until forced to review it. But it drives him mad every year, so Santa Christ has to wipe his memory every time.
The first two movies the Nostalgia Critic thought that Ma-Ti was talking about were...
- Plan 9 from Outer Space. An infamously bad movie, one that no doubt many fans would clamor for him to review, as Ma-Ti suggested.
- The Phantom Menace. It's prime NC material, a big title, and was released 11 years before the 100th episode, even longer than Battlefield Earth. You now feel old.
- Bio-Dome. He would later on go to review it, as he claimed it was by far one of the worst he has done.
- Old Dogs. Not nostalgic, but VERY bad.
- Lost in Space. He did review it mere weeks later, coincidence?
NC and Spoony will do a camera-to-camera review of Highlander 3
To mirror his crossover with Linkara.
The Critic will resolve his issues with Doug after reviewing Doug's 1st movie.
Maybe reviewing the lackluster film based on the show he hates the most will help him get over his problems.
The Critic WILL ACTUALLY HAVE A CROSSOVER WITH NASH
In his commentary for the Simon Sez review, he said that he was planning on doing two more crossovers by the end of the year. He, then, made a gag about wanting to have a crossover with Nash in the Doug's First Movie review. This gag was foreshadowing for a future crossover review that he'll be having with Nash this year.
- Does this count?
Linkara's cameo and Star Trek Month...
He won't make one. There will be cameos from others. However, Linkara will be completely absent. However, the first Nostalgia Critic episode after that he'll interrupt complaining how the Nostalgia Critic cut him out, but NC will cut him off.
- Alternately, the Critic will think each cameo is Linkara, though with increasing skepticism about whether it actually is, until the last one, when he wises up and realizes it won't be Linkara... and this time it's actually Linkara.
- Alternately, Linkara is The Man Behind the Man behind each cameo, just to screw with The Nostalgia Critic.
- He'll make like a 5-second cameo saying something along the lines of "Oh hey Critic, I can't make it."
- All Jossed.
The Nostalgia Critic's final review will be the last movie before his cut-off point.
What better way to end Doug's tenure as the Nostalgia Critic then with a movie that he considers the last bit of nostalgia for him?
The Nostalgia Critic will review Nostalgia.
Come on! He's the Nostalgia Critic, it only makes sense that he reviews something that's in his name.
The Christmas Special
The Christmas Special was Santa Christ's story.
Think about it. He opened and closed the episode out like he was reading a story and the last time he was around, Critic accidentally went shooty-shooty. So why would he consider him to be anything more than a "dirty rotten bastard" who nobody would miss? And the other's grumpy-hate reactions at the end are strangely reminiscent of their whole "wanting him dead" thing for Kickassia . True, this would prove that Santa Christ isn't all-knowing, not taking into account the Chick's childhood fucked her up good or the fact that Ask That Guy messed up his life happily on his own or even that Critic usually hates reviewing for making his life suck. It would also say that Santa Christ is slightly petty and indulges in grudge fantasies, but you can always take that as adding a bit more ambiguity to a Parody Sue. Everybody wins!
- Three more things. It's never mentioned again. Everyone goes back to their usual characterization. Santa Christ is definitely colder to the Critic in Care Bears II.
The Christmas Special was a dirty trick played by God.
Why did he do it? Maybe he still felt bitter over the events of The Ten Commandments vs. The Prince of Egypt. Maybe he was punishing the Critic for letting Santa Claus die in his nostalgic commercial special. Maybe he's just a dick. The point is, God felt like making the Critic feel rotten, so he redirected his guardian angel's pathway to a random reality, possibly realities, where everything worked out for the TGWTG crew, and the guardian angel.
The God in Roger's alternate future is the Nostalgia Critic
Even the Nostalgia Critic would've benefited from not existing. Of course, the present-Critic doesn't know about that.
Every single person on the site would have been benefited by the Nostalgia Critic's non-existence
- Film Brain would be king of England.
- I'm pretty sure by Matthews birth, half of Europe would have to die before he was next in line for the throne (No, not Britain, Europe).
- Perhaps they dispensed with the monarchy, and Film Brain is the Prime Minister.
- I'm pretty sure by Matthews birth, half of Europe would have to die before he was next in line for the throne (No, not Britain, Europe).
- Todd in the Shadows would be the head producer, songwriter and ruler of the pop industry. And he'd have decent lighting.
- Heart would be an awesome power.
- Ma-Ti is still the same, though. Being the Butt Monkey and all.
- Fanficcers everywhere would ask themselves 'What Would Bennett the Sage do?'.
- Dr. Insano would be renamed 'Dr. Sano' and go on to cure cancer and such with his alien robots, later becoming president of a now-Canada-less world.
- Or never existed, as this timeline's Spoony isn't as prone to insanity.
- Welshy would be married to Anne Hathaway.
Some things are far worse for people because of the Critic's non-existence
This is going both off the above and the special:
- Angry Joe is admitted by darn near everywhere to be President Evil and nuked all of Canada. This also by extension kills Jesu Otaku's fellow Desu Des Brigade Member Arkada, not to mention billions of innocents. Plus who's to stay he won't, or hasn't already, bombed France and several other countries.
- Oh and his presidency? Caused by murdering President Insano.
- The "world peace in a week"? The world was so scared shitless at Angry Joe's firepower, they soon surrendered. They applauded because they were afraid Angry Joe would vaporize them.
- And the world piece was shattered as(noted towards the bottom) Phelous, along with several of the remaining reviewers, attacks America, plunging it into another war to free it from Joe's grasp.
- The Cinema Snob probably has a half dozen STD's from making porn instead of watching it and he will never be Happily Married.
- Given the Chick's problems, while she remains a good director, her personal life will no doubt be in shambles in no time. And that whole section was big on the Stepford Smiler vibe.
- Linkara has turned into an Ebenezer Scrooge-type Jerkass due to his power and wealth.
- Harvey Finevoice, who was never found by Linkara, was shot to death by the Mafia.
- Iron Liz is still working at Shacks and Gentry and will never meet Linkara.
- Pollo is still in the closet at Linkara's parents house, bitter and alone.
- Which as a few tropers have probably guessed Leads to him becoming Mechakara, and conquering or at least trying to conquer the world.
- Without Linkara to stop him Lord Vyce will enslave our dimension.
- 90's Kid was shot dead by his landlord.
- Spoony as the Critic has prevented several people from becoming reviewers. The only reason for Douchey loving him is because he does whatever his trolls say, which also led to his Breakup with Scarlett, and Burton being shoved back in the closet. As a result he's also the only person on the site, as he kept bumping anyone fans didn't like.
- Todd is now one of the sleazy producers making the same shit he ridicules in reality.
- Marz Gurl is the Nostalgia Chick, but as a result has abandoned Anime forever.
- Due to her now constant fear of getting bumped thanks to Spoony's occasional Orwellian Editor tendencies getting channeled into pleasing the trolls, Jesu Otkau leaves her old friends behind. Without her to provide a balance to the team, the site falls apart.
- The one upside being Tsubake never got built.... but without the brigade Prof became bitter without anyone to rely on, Vixen turned into a Small Name, Big Ego, Ark... was doing pretty good up until the whole blowing up with the rest of Canada thing. And Mal isolated himself from the world at large. As for the brigaders... nothing really happened to them, there wasn't a brigade for them to join but considering the rest of the Domino effect.
- Bennett the Sage becomes President Angry Joe's Treacherous Advisor and manipulates him, helping Joe turn America into a Dictatorship and Evil Empire with time.
- Paw will never form a cute OT 3 with Todd and Roses and stay on his own.
- Phelous survived the destruction of Canada. However the nation's destruction filled him with rage, and Phelous is forming a terrorist cell to end America.
Quebec convinced Alaska to withdraw from the U.S. and become a part of Canada
Which is why Angry Joe had no qualms blowing it up along with the rest of Cananda. It's also why he singled out Quebec.
- Probably extends to much of New England too.
The Christmas special was a massive Xanatos Gambit by Lord Vyce
Linkara may be the champion of this universe but sooner or later Vyce would have to deal with Doug. Given that the Critic can beat the Angry Video Game Nerd, the man who killed Bugs Bunny with his bare hands, Vyce likely knew that even his powers would be trumped by cartoon logic of that magnitude. So he created the special as an illusion, with two possible outcomes in mind.
1. It would completely break the Critic's will/and/or drive him to suicide, getting him out of Vyce's way.
2. To plant seeds of doubt in Doug's mind, as a contingency in case Linkara manged to defeat him. As the Critic has traveled in time before, Vyce's plan is that eventually the events of the special will get to him.
In a fit of despair Doug will travel back and erase himself from existence. Without meeting the Critic Linkara will become the Corrupt Corporate Executive we saw in the special, never meeting Liz, Harvey or 90's kid or obtaining any of his equipment and powers, effectively undoing his defeat of Vyce. This will all culminate in the next anniversary special, where Vyce now rules our world, forcing Rob (Turned back into a Dinosaur as a punishment for opposing Vyce) and the Nerd will launch an effort to return the timeline to normal by trying to convince the Critic his life was worth living. The TGWTG crew will help or hinder them, as some will prefer their new lives and others will sell out to Vyce. Alternate Linkara will sell out to Vyce for profit, with Liz having to give him a "I Know You're in There Somewhere" Fight.
- And God didn't fight back this massive alteration of reality? This implies three things:
- Vyce can pull one over God Himself.
- Vyce is immune to the effects of God, since he originates outside of His Creation.
- Vyce is such a danger that God himself doesn't want to mess with him.
- Vyce got around the God problem by using the one thing that could stop him... Super Mecha Death Christ, whose still alive and kicking as he was no longer destroyed in the Brawl. Since the father, the son and the holy ghost are considred to be aspects of the same enitiy it would be impossible for God to oppose Death Christ since they are part of the same being, and nothing can oppose God's will. Just look at the Brawl, where Death Christ and Donkey Kong Jesus erased each other from existence because of the paradox of two parts of God opposing the other clashed with the infalibity of God's will. God opposing Death Christ would cause a similar reaction, forcing him to remain neutral.
Vyce will also form a Five Bad Band to back him up.
1. The Big Bad: Vyce himself obviously
2. The Dragon: Evil Linkara. Vyce will turn on Mechakara, seeing his plans for a machine revolution as a potential threat.
3. The Brute: President Evil Joe. Vyce knows Joe's an acomplished fighter as he played a major role in his downfall. Impressed by his ruthlessness in destroying Canada, Vyce will allow him to retain his position in exchange for acknowleging him as his overlord. In fact he'll keep his prescene unknown to the general public, as he'll use Joe as a proxy to carry out his bidding.
4. The Evil Genius: Doctor Insano. He'll also serve as The Starscream for Linkara.
5. The Dark Chick: Doctor Smith and The Nostalgia Chick. Smith will use his army of Spiders as Vyce's secret police, but given his woobie status he'll eventually realise how far things have gone and defect to the good guys. Its pretty obvious that all is not well in the Nostalgia Chick's seemingly idealic home life. Both her and her husband give off a Stepford Smiler vibe, and given his sociopathic nature it's not hard to see her going to the dark side. Worse still, she's secretly been using her career as a director to subtly indoctrinate the public to Vyce's and Joe's will. After his take over she'll become the Goebel to Vyce's Hitler, with only Nella holding her back from crossing the moral Event Horizon. Eventually she's shaken back to her senses when Vyce, in a moment of rage lashes out at Nella, prompting her to switch sides.
You're A Rotten, Dirty Bastard was a Test Of Character.
Not for the Critic, but for Roger. You see, God decided to train Roger for the rigorous job of being an angel. Due to the fall of Satan, all angels need a morality test. Since God was pissed off at the Old Versus New: Ten Commandments video(he took it as the Critic not thinking he was badass), he used the Nostalgia Critic as his target. Roger was unaware that the reality he visited was a world that was already vastly different than our own, and the Nostalgia Critic's non-existence didn't have anything to do with it. It was purposely made deceptively worse than the regular world(Angry Joe is President Evil, Nostalgia Chick is a Stepford Smiler, Linkara is greedy...). And in that reality Roger was God's best friend, and a dead ringer for His replacement. Through this, Roger's greed and self-serving nature was exposed. The Big Bad in Suburban Knights is the ultimate fate of Roger-banished to the mortal plane as punishment. Alterations in personality are due to Roger being reincarnated over the centuries.
The Room Review
The seahorses are responsible for the disappearance of The Room reviews
Yes, the Nostalgia Critic exposed the seahorses' intentions to Take Over the World, so naturally the seahorses had to make the video disappear. The disappearance of Obscurus Lupa's review is just the seahorses covering their tracks, and making sure everyone will blame server problems, overzealous lawyers, or other problems. But we're on to you, seahorses! Thanks to the Streisand Effect, lots of people are going to see that video anyway. Your diabolical schemes will never come to fruition!
- I for one welcome our new seahorse overlords...
The Room reviews were taken off because...
- Douchey McNitpick hacked NC's account?
- Decade removed it?
- The Seahorses removed it (see up)
- Close! Copyright infringement. So they say.
- The video left of its own accord to get something to eat HUH?
John from The Room Movie Dot Com will appear in Old VS. New: War Of The Worlds
It's been delayed thanks to The Room issue. Seeing as this video will require "Copyrighted Images" from TWO movies it's bound to piss off John, who just got a new job at War Of The Worlds Movies Dot Com. Perfect opportunity to eviscerate him again for The Room issue again.
- Jossed, he's not going to review it.
The seahorses are able to conquer the world because...
The world peace resulting from Critic's review of Zeus and Roxanne means there is no longer a need for any form of military. The seahorses will attack after a generation or so of peace.
The Room holds the secret to stopping the Seahorses.
That's why even in their time the movie is banned. Wiseau was Obfuscating Stupidity, so no-one notices his fool-proof plan to defeating seahorses is in the movie's coding. He removed it because the seahorses were blackmailing him
The Seahorses are led by John from The Room Movie dot Com
And The Room is outlawed in the future so that no one will slander Tommy Wiseau's beautiful existence by watching him.
The Seahorses are actually benevolent rulers.
Hence why no-one has tried to Make Right What Was Once Wrong. The seahorses are peaceful rulers, who keep mankind happy. They were only after The Room because they have spent their time eliminating any bad movies. This is the reason why Future Critic is an inventor: without bad movies, he's lost his job.
Chuck Norris returns in Old vs. New: Ten Commandments vs. The Prince of Egypt
As Vengeful God. Not exactly happy that He chose love and peace God over badass God, and He and Mako still hasn't gotten over the Sidekicks review. He is also the father of Santa Christ and He's not pleased with fact that the Critic shot him in Kickassia.
Nostalgia Critic's gun is magic.
The Nostalgia Critic was able to do things like kill Santa Christ and shoot at people in a video and nearly kill them. He could even kill an angel. It is more subtle than Linkara's magic gun but it has powers beyond comprehension.
- To add to this, I bet Nostalgia Critic bought his magic gun from the same place Linkara bought his.
- Linkara's magic gun only works to protect him, because of the soul of a little girl. But Critic's gun has killed a lot of innocent people, including Mary Poppins, an angel, and Santa Christ. So whose soul is in there?
- A segment of his own, hence why it appears out of nowhere when he need/wants it, because in a way it's a part of him.
- No soul at all. It's the Speaking Gun from Simon R. Green's Nightside series. It can kill both angels and demons and destroys its targets by speaking their true names and removing them from existence. Also, it's sentient and takes over the will of those who use it. The eradications of Mary Poppins and Mickey Mouse, performed by a tearful Critic who just can't stop firing the Gun, tend to support this theory.
Will live. They can rebuild him. They have the technology.
General Zod will return for new videos around the holidays in 2011.
Because of the Awesome!
- Sadly Jossed.
Critic has a thing going on with Maven
- Three reasons: 1) the Chick's too interested in chasing something she can't have and Nella's not really his type. 2) Vampires (even wannabes) love pale flesh. 3) He had painful-looking hickeys on his neck in both Jungle 2 Jungle and Transformers III, who else would give them to him?
Scatman Crothers will become the new Mako
In Raiders of the Story Arc: Transformers, NC mistaked Jazz's voice actor, the late Scatman Crothers, for Bill Cosby because of how he sounded. He then proceeded to dub Jazz's line with an impression of Cosby. Obviously, fans of Crothers won't take this joke lightly and give NC some harsh emails, like when he made fun of Mako's voice acting in TMNT.
- And how they probably should have stayed instead of going back to comforting him if he cried during a one-on-one crossover
- one of the seahorses' natural predators