The Queen/Funny

• Courtesy of the Queen Mum:

If there is a photographer out there, he could be the first kill of the day.

• The first Blair/Queen meeting:

HM Queen Elizabeth II: Have we shown you how to start a nuclear war yet? Tony Blair: Er, no. HM Queen Elizabeth II: First thing we do apparently, then we take away your passport and spend the rest of our time sending you around the world. Tony Blair: You obviously know my job better than I do. HM Queen Elizabeth II: Yes well, you are my tenth Prime Minister, Mister Blair. My first of course was Winston Churchill, he sat in your chair in a frock coat and top hat. And he was kind enough to give a shy young girl like me quite an education. Tony Blair: I would imagine.

• A very, very dark example, but funny if you can remember the real Princess Margaret:

Prince Philip: I've just come off the phone to your sister. The Queen: Well I hope you told her to come back and cut her holiday short. Prince Philip: Of course. The Queen: I imagine she wasn't best pleased. Prince Philip: That's putting it mildly. The Queen: What did she say? Prince Philip: Something about Diana managing to be even more annoying dead than alive.